Come on get happy

I don't make New Years resolutions because I (and 99% of the world), suck at keeping them.  However, I have decided I have some goals that will hopefully make me a happier person.  The fact that I am making them at the beginning of a new year doesn't mean they are new years resolutions.  The new year just happens to coincide with last week's realization that I am fucked in the head.  So, in no particular order, my goals are:

• Me time.  This may be the most important.  I think I have an unhealthy obsession with my daughter, so maybe it will help if I get back to spending a little time with myself.  I have a few relaxing hobbies that include drawing and crafting.  My initial goal is to spend at least 30 minutes each day drawing.  
• Think before I speak.  Most of the time the snippy comments just come out.  I can't help them.  But I'm going to make an effort to pause before I say crap like that.  I will likely realize it is just not necessary. 
• Be nice.  I am going to make an effort to give a sincere compliment everyday.  I think S deserves this the most.  
• Be thankful.  I think I focus too much on what S doesn't do, and not enough time on what he does.  I need to shift this in the other direction.  I will not only say thank you, but say why I am thankful.  Hopefully this will help me see how much he helps.  
• Let go.  I need to realize that my way is not the only way.  Sure S may dress Maddie a little differently than me, or not hold her exactly the same, but the end result is usually the same.  So I need to let go of the control.  This may be the hardest goal for me to accomplish, but the one I need the most.  I can't complain that I do everything when I won't let anyone help me.  

I am just not ready to seek out professional help, so I'm hoping that I can get a little better on my own by just following the above steps.  I've been depressed before, and I've been through years of therapy.  I know the drill by now.  Therapists can't fix you, they only give you the tools to fix yourself.  I'm pretty sure the tools are the same, now it's time to dust them off and get to work.